Preparations? 04/02

Since I've finished the registry, I am wanting so bad to get her whole nursery put together. I am imagining her whole pink room and how cute it would be down to every detail. From the birdie bedding, to the curtains with matching valance, to the bird mirrors and the birdcage chandelier. The birds fit her so well and I had an overwhelming attachment to the set the minute I saw it in the store. I couldn't leave it.  A part of me very much wants to get everything and have it prepared for her. A sign to her that says we haven't given up and we're not going to give up. But I also can't bare the thought of a physical reminder of our loss through an empty, vacant nursery. It's so hard to figure out what to do.
We've got her 2 outfits, 2 blankets, some stuffed animals and her keepsake box. But I want to get her more. I have moments where I don't know if its hopefulness or fleeting flashes of denial but I want to get everything for her and be prepared for her arrival. I know her chances of making it to term are slim, and if we are able to meet her alive, it'll be for likely for only a few minutes... but there is a possibility that she will come home with us for a couple days! And if that does become possible, what would I do, say okay thanks, just watch her while we run to the store real quick to get some supplies? I'm pretty sure you can't take a baby out of the hospital without a car seat right? So do we buy one, in case she does in fact get to come home? How about a bassinet...where will she sleep? Although we're getting a crib and a changing table to have and for hopefully our future family, we're not getting any bedding to put on it. And given her condition and the limited time we have with her, there's no way I would put her in the crib in a complete other room, so she'd have to do the bassinet. But then again, I know for a fact if she came home, there's no way I would sleep! Why would I waste precious time sleeping that I could have with my daughter? So given that, I guess I really don't even need to prepare much for her because she would be in our arms the entire time! I would never want to put her down.
Sometimes this all gets so confusing. I'm pregnant with my little angel, moving inside me, and not able to prepare for her. And not preparing for her in many ways, makes me feel like I've lost hope. So if preparing for her represents hopefulness, and not preparing for her homecoming represents the loss of hope...what do i do? That's the line I keep teetering back and forth on. I have hope and believe that she can be healed, but if I only think of her in the fact that she'll be with us, and it turns out she's not, it'll make losing her that much harder.

Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God  ; he is my mighty rock, my refuge.   Psalm 62.5