4.18.2011

Pain, Grief and Joy 04/18

The past couple of days I have felt unusually sad about Lyla's condition. From the beginning I was always very hopfeful and feeling okay about everything. But the past couple of days I have been feeling hopless, even though I hate to say it. For some reason I feel like everything has just hit me in a new way and I'm realizing for the first time, the seriousness of her condition. It's like I'm finally realizing the matter of fact 'truth' about how this is going to go and how it's going to end. The fantasy about bringing her home no longer makes me excited and ready to decorate a nursery, in hope that she'll spend awhile with us. I now imagine just how tiny her little body is going to be, and I'm picturing putting her like a rag-doll into a carseat meant for 'nomral sized' babies and seeing a single strap envelope her entire body. It makes me sick to my stomach to think about and I can't bare to imagine it anymore. Why can't she just be okay and start growing?!
I know I haven't truely lost hope. I just have fleeting moments of feeling sad and angry that this is happening to my sweet girl. She doesn't deserve it and it frustrates me.
BUT as I am feeling all of these things, the Lord has a way of letting me experience the pain and grief, but giving me joy as well. This morning, before I was even fully awake, Lyla decided to give me about 7 or 8 bonafide kicks. I was so taken by the force of them that I let my hand rest on my belly where she always lays. Sure enough, I felt her for the first time, kick from the outside. I was so mad that Adam wasn't there to feel this. Her movements are typically so gentle and delicate, it's impossible to feel from the outside. I wondered if we would ever be able to experience this because of her size and lack of weight. I had also heard that many triploidy babies lacked muscle tone...not my little girl. Her kicks today were proof of that!
It's funny how opposites can coesxist together. Pain and grief and joy often dance together in moments like these.
When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
Some of you say 'Joy is better than sorrow,'
Others say 'Nay, sorrow is the greater.'
But I say unto you, they are inseperable.
- Kahlil Gibran

3 comments:

  1. Oh, Laura, My heart breaks with you.

    God blesses those who mourn,for they will be comforted. Matthew 5:4

    You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing.
    You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy, that I might sing praises to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever! Psalm 30:11,12

    The Lord is faithful that he will bring you to the other side of this darkness and into the light of joy.
    ♥♥♥

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  2. Laura, I just want you to know that we are all praying for you, Adam, and little Lyla. What a beautiful name you've given her :) We love you and want you to know that our thoughts are with you.

    Big Hugs Always,
    Dino, Carmen, Dean and Lilia.

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  3. Laura, Thank you so much for sharing all that you have in your life. You are a wonderful mother, your strength is inspirational! Thank you also for the beautiful card. Lots of love from all of us. Honor and family :)

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